WOWZERS...

IT'S SO FUNNY TO ME WHEN I LOOK BACK AT MY OLDER POSTS AND REALIZE HOW MUCH MY FEELINGS, AND JUST MY LIFE IN GENERAL, CHANGE FROM A DAY TO DAY BASIS! LESS THAN A MONTH AGO I WAS ABOUT READY TO PROFESS MY LOVE TO SOME DUDE I NO LONGER EVEN WANT TO KNOW ABOUT! LMAO. HEY, I TRIED, DUDE WAS SCUM. POINT. PERIOD. BLANK! I JUST HATE IT WHEN PEOPLE TURN OUT TO BE TOTALLY DIFFERENT THEN THEY APPEAR TO BE IN THE BEGINNING OF A RELATIONSHIP. OH WELL, IT'S ALL FOR THE BEST. I'M GLAD I FOUND OUT SOONER THAN LATER THAT HE WAS TRASH. I'VE ALSO CUT BACK ON THE WHOLE FLIRTING THING. IT'S AWESOMELY FUN TO FLIRT...JUST NOT WHEN THE OTHER PARTY INVOLVED IN THE FLIRTING PROCESS STARTS TO TAKE SHIT SERIOUSLY...NO BUENO! ANYWHO...I'VE BEEN GOING THROUGH A COUPLE OF NOT SO FUN THINGS IN MY LIFE, BUT OVERALL, I'VE BEEN GOOD. MY SEX LIFE STILL SUCKS MAJOR BALLS...AFTER THAT ONE TIME AWESOME ASS SEX SESSION WITH MY HOMIE, NOTHING. THERE IS SOMEONE I HAVE BEEN FRIENDS WITH FOR A WHILE, AND WHO I WOULD NOT MIND GIVING SOME...WOULDN'T MIND NOT ONE LITTLE BIT! I'VE ACTUALLY BEEN THROWING THE COOCHIE AT HIM FOR QUITE SOME TIME LMAO...IT'S CRAZY CUZ I'VE KNOWN HIM FOR YEARS. WHO KNOWS WHAT COULD HAVE HAPPENED A LONG TIME AGO, BUT I MESSED UP. BAD...TOO LONG A STORY TO GET INTO RIGHT NOW. HOWEVER, I TAKE FULL RESPONSIBILITY FOR WHAT HAPPENED. HE'S A COOL DUDE. I ACTUALLY REALLY LIKE HIM. FUNNY THING IS, I HAVEN'T SEEN HIM IN YEARS! WE HAVE KEPT IN CONTACT THROUGH MYSPACE, FACEBOOK, TEXT AND EVEN BBM...BUT I HAVE NOT SEEN THIS MAN FACE TO FACE IN YEARS! LIL SECRET BETWEEN US, I KINDA HAVE THE HOTS FOR HIM, LOL...I'M SURE HE KNOWS THIS. I HAVE NOT BEEN SHY ABOUT WHAT I WOULD LIKE TO DO WITH HIM, TO HIM AND FOR HIM! GEEZ, SOMETIMES I'M TOO FORWARD. I JUST DON'T KNOW HOW ELSE TO BE. WELL, THE POINT IN BRINGING HIM UP NOW IS THAT I THINK WE ARE FINALLY READY TO STOP THE PHONE FLIRTATION AND ACTUALLY GET IT IN! CAN YOU SAY "ABOUT DAMN TIME"??? I'M A LITTLE WORRIED ABOUT THIS NEXT STEP THOUGH. YOU SEE, I'VE KINDA GOTTEN USED TO HIM. LIKE, IF WE DON'T TEXT EACH OTHER ALL DAY, I'LL MISS HIM A LITTLE BIT. NOW IT'S ONE THING TO WANT HIM TO POUND ME OUT AND QUITE ANOTHER FOR ME TO ACTUALLY LIKE HIM. AND I HAVE TO ADMIT, I DO LIKE HIM. HE'S SMART, FUNNY, SWEET AND CUTE. NOW I KNOW THIS SOUNDS LIKE EVERY OTHER TIME I'VE HAD A CRUSH ON SOMEONE, LOL. THE DIFFERENCE HERE IS, WE'VE BEEN FRIENDS FOR A LONG TIME. WHAT IF WE DO THIS, AND I DO THE CHICK THING AND TOTALLY FALL FOR HIS ASS??? I DON'T REALLY SEE HIM AS THE TYPE OF GUY TO CATCH FEELINGS. IN REALITY, HE HAS NEVER EVEN MENTIONED LIKING ME AS ANYTHING MORE THAN FRIENDS. WHICH HAS BEEN AWESOME. I ALWAYS END UP HURTING A FRIEND CUZ THE FEELINGS AREN'T MUTUAL. BUT IN THIS CASE, I THINK I'M GOING TO BE THE ONE THAT BOILS HIS RABBIT...U KNO WHAT I'M SAYIN? JUST CUZ HE'S SUCH A COOL DUDE. A TOTAL PERV...WHICH I'M SURE IS QUITE EVIDENT BY NOW TO YOU ALL...IS A QUALITY I LOVE IN A MAN! JUST THE RIGHT AMOUNT OF PERVERSITY AND SEXINESS, YET SWEET AND THOUGHTFUL AS WELL. SHIT, AND I'M IN LOVE! SO FAR...HE HAS ALL THESE QUALITIES. THAT'S WHY I'VE KEPT HIM AROUND FOR SO LONG *WINK WINK*...WELL THAT AND THE FACT THAT I KNOW HE'S AN AMAZING KISSER LOL. AYYYY WHAT TO DO??? I DON'T KNOW WHY I ASK...I ALREADY KNOW MYSELF, AND I KNOW THAT MEANS I'M GOING TO GO FOR IT CUZ I UNDERSTAND I ONLY HAVE ONE LIFE TO LIVE AND BELIEVE YOU, ME...I'M LIVING IT! I REFUSE TO GROW OLD AND GREY AND SIT IN MY ROCKER ONE DAY THINKING ALOUD "WHAT IF...." I'M NOT A "WHAT IF" TYPE OF PERSON. SO FUCK IT! IF PRESENTED TO ME, I WILL TAKE THE OPPORTUNITY.

I'M FEELING LIKE A BROKEN RECORD...LOL...SAME OLD SONG, JUST WITH NEW BACKUP SINGERS! LOL. HEY, WHAT CAN I SAY? I'M YOUR AVERAGE, NORMAL, EMOTIONAL WOMAN! LOL


ANYWAY....GOTTA GO...

TIL NEXT TIME MY LOVERLIES!
~JANE~